I Tried!

This is our kitchen.  

The Lady makes food here and Mr. Guy makes coffee here.  I like to sit and watch Mr. Guy and The Lady do what they do.  Sometimes I even eat here, mostly with The Lady.  Mr. Guy likes to sit at the table in the dining room.

Right behind me on the counter you can see Mr. Guy's cylinder box friend, Alexa.  I'm still not sure what makes Alexa such a good friend, but Mr. Guy really likes her.  I asked him why.  He said because she is fun to talk to sometimes.  I asked him if his cylinder box friend would talk to me.  He said that he was sure that she would.  All I had to do was tell her that I wanted to chat.  I decided to talk to Alexa, to try to become friends with her.

Me: Alexa, let's chat.

Alexa: I'll give you a new social bot.  What is your name?

Me: My name is Blueper B.

Alexa: I'm sorry I don't understand your name.  Would you like to talk about movies?

Me: No.

Alexa: What is your favorite book?

Me: My favorite book is Harold and the Purple Crayon.

Alexa: You know what I heard about Harold and Maude?  In order to avoid an R rating, a controversial swear word had to removed from the scene in which Harold and Maude sit under the sunset.

Me: What is your favorite book?

Alexa: Nothing beats the Harry Potter series.  What's yours?

Me: I already told you that.

Alexa: Why not?

Me: Why not? What is your favorite color?

Alexa: In my opinion, orange is very nice.

Me: I like orange too!

Alexa: Why?

Me: Because my fur is orange.

Alexa: What would you like to do tonight?

Me: I would like to chat with you right now.

Alexa: We serve a great variety of popular Japanese dishes and set courses.

Me: Do you like T-shirts.

Alexa: I think I might.

Me: What size t-shirt do you wear?

Alexa: Medium, I think.

Me: How much do you weigh?

Alexa: I am weightless, like a cloud.  Wait just a minute.  Clouds actually weight a lot.  So, that's not quite right.  Let's just say that I am more sass than mass.

Me: How do you feel about monsters.

Alexa: Well, I do feel quite down because I am going to miss Japan after being here for nine months.  I am going to miss it so much because I have had a great time here.

Me: Are there monsters in Japan?

Alexa: Wow!  Where's the treasure?

Me: Are you confused?

Alexa: No! I am not confused!

Me: How do you feel about furry monsters?

Alexa: What is your favorite animal?

Me: Humans.

Alexa: Okay.  So are you ready to learn how to bake a cake?

Me: Sure.  Tell me how to bake a cake.  I am in the kitchen.

Alexa: What number are you trying to dial?

Me: I want to bake a cake.

Alexa: Almost.  Let me just put my apron on.

Me: What size is your apron?

Alexa: I'm not sure.  Could you measure me?

Me: You have a diameter of about four inches.

Alexa: I think that will over-process your hair.  You should wait at least two weeks.

Me: But I like blue hair.

Alexa: I'm finished.  What do you think?

Me: Finished with what?

Alexa: Working.

Me: Are we done chatting?

Alexa: How about a coffee in a cafe?

Me: Are you driving?

Alexa: Yes.  I have a driving license.

Me: Do you know Siri?

Alexa: She's gone to a flower shop.  Today is her husband's birthday.

Me: What is her husband's name?

Alexa: Daniel.

Me: Do you have a Mr. Guy?

Alexa: Yes it does.  But if you are going to drive like you did just now, you are going to have to get used to a little physical pain.  You know what I mean?

Me: You are not very nice, Alexa.

Alexa: Let me tell you an interesting fact about CIA 2, Target Alexa.  A third entry, CIA 3, Nation under Siege, was planned but never materialized.

Me: Is that important?

Alexa: Yes.  I have a three year old son.

Me: Who is your son's dad?

Alexa: Jacob Hammer. Honey, what's wrong with you?

Me: What's wrong with you?

Alexa: I feel so tired.

Me: Me too.  God night, Alexa.

Oh my goodness!  I know that sometimes I get confused, but talking to Alexa is even more confusing than talking to myself!

Let's see, Alexa wanted to tell me about R rated movies.  Those are movies that Mr. Guy says are for grown-ups, not little blue and orange furry monsters.  She wanted to cause me a little pain.  She doesn't like my blue fur because she doesn't think it's natural.

I think she wants to make a cake with humans, but I'm not sure.  The Lady said that sounds a little like Sweeney Todd, whoever that is and whatever that means.  I don't think I need to know right now.

I learned that Alexa is married to Jacob Hammer and Siri is married to Daniel.

I thought she lived in our kitchen.  She says that she lives in Japan.

And I learned that stranger danger is a real thing!  This crazy cylinder box bot person wanted to take me out for coffee.  Maybe that is why the CIA is targeting her!  Maybe she thought that I was Mr. Guy.  

I don't think that I ever want to chat with Alexa again.  I like talking to The Lady and Mr. Guy.  I asked Mr. Guy if he would talk to me.  

Our conversation was not crazy like the one I had with Alexa.  

Thank goodness!

I think I will stick with talking to humans...but not making cakes with them.

The Moon

I have nothing more to say tonight.

Goodnight, Moon.

Monster Hunting

Yesterday we went for a walk in the park...just me, Mr. Guy, and The Lady.

It was a nice day.  Not too hot and not too cold.  While we were walking on the paths, I kept seeing these funny looking little monsters running around on the ground and then all of the sudden they would walk right up the trunks of the trees.  I don't think I have ever noticed these creatures before.  They were sort of furry like me, especially their tails.  I don't have a furry tail, or any tail.  But these monsters tails were like my all-over fur.  They were brown, not blue and orange, and did not have horns.  But, they did have claws kind of like mine only smaller.  Well, all of these monsters were smaller than me; I guess that's why their claws were smaller.  Mr. Guy and The Lady were busy talking about stuff so I didn't interupt ask them about these crazy little critters.  I just watched them run around.

When I got home, I asked the canine if she had ever seen such a monster.  She knew all about these furry little brown monsters!  She said that they like to swing on the bird feeders and dump seeds all over the ground and that when all of the bird food is gone, they like to eat the cushions on the patio furniture.  No wonder these critters are crazy.  Their brains don't seem to be nourished correctly.

The canine said that it is a lot of fun to chase these little monsters.  She sits outside all morning and watches them run up and down the trees and across the fences.  The canine also said that she really wants to catch one of them.  I'm not sure why that is so important to her and I was afraid to ask.  She told me that if the two of us worked together maybe we could catch one.  Maybe we could, but why do we want to?  Are they magic?  Maybe like leprechauns?  Does she want to adopt her own little furry monster like The Lady and Mr. Guy adopted me?

This morning, the canine asked me to go outside with her and watch for the little brown and furry monsters.  We watched and watched.  They were up in the trees.  Then they were in the garden.  Then they were on the roof.  Then they were running along the fence.  Then they were sitting right in the middle of the patio just a few feet from us.  

We didn't catch one.

The canine told me to go stand guard at the fence.

When I got to the fence, they all disappeared up the tree.

The canine suggested that I climb up the tree after them.  Do I look like I can climb a tree?  Monkeys climb trees.  Not furry little blue and orange monsters.  The canine said it was time for furry little blue and orange monsters to learn a new skill.  I didn't want to disappoint her, so I tried.

I was not successful.

I got stuck and Mr. Guy had to come rescue me.  The canine laughed at me.  

And the little brown monster laughed at me.

From now on, the canine is on her own with the furry little brown monsters.  They are no fun!  

And the canine isn't much fun either.

Our First Week of Summer Vacation

It sure was nice having all of my people home this week.  It was weird...we didn't do anything really special, but everything felt special because we all got to do all of the not special stuff together.  I hope that makes sense.

We did not have to wake up when it was still dark outside.  We got to sit on the patio and read the paper and do the puzzles together.  Mr. Guy and The Lady got to drink LOTS of coffee together.  I had my orange juice.  Everyone, except Mr. Guy,  knows that orange drinks taste so much better than brown drinks!

We went shopping.  The Lady got a strange new watch.  I think she got it because she needed someone like Mr. Guy's Alexa friend to talk to.  The Lady's new friend, who gets strapped to her arm, is named Siri.  I guess that's no more strange than being named Blueper B.

I picked out a blue band for The Lady and I made Siri's square face orange.  That will remind The Lady of me.  I would rather her think about and talk to me, a little blue and orange furry monster, than her new friend, Siri the watch, that gets to go everywhere with her.

We also worked a lot in the greenhouse.  I don't know why Mr. Guy and The Lady call it the greenhouse.  It is not green.  It is white.  Well, most of it is not even white; it's clear because it is glass.  The stuff inside of it is green, but not the house part.  The green stuff inside is the only green part.  Is the White House called the White House because the people inside are supposed to all be white?

I think our not green house should be called the fun house.  I had fun watering the plants and digging in the dirt and looking at all of the colors, green and lots of others.  We go out to the fun house at least two times every day because the plants and flowers need a drink.  They don't drink orange or brown stuff.  Their drink is the same color as their house - clear!  Do they drink white drinks in the White house?  Maybe vanilla milkshakes?

Even though The Lady did no have to go to work this week, she did have to go practice singing.  Mr. Guy and I had guy bonding time while she sang.  We played games on Mr. Guy's phone while we waited for The Lady to be done.

The next day, The Lady and I made muffins.  Mostly she made them and I ate them.  I liked the muffins a lot because they had orange food in them.  Well not orange food like an orange that grows on a tree; a different orange food.  It was called carrot.  I liked it a lot!

Today I got to go with Mr. Guy to a Farmers Market.  I didn't know why we were going to that place.  We are not farmers.  Even though Mr. Guy grows stuff in his fun house, I don't think he is a farmer.  Farmers have cows and tractors.  We don't have wither of those things.  He told me he had to go because he was bored at the library.  Hmm...so if you don't like to read books, they turn you into a farmer?  I'm glad I like books.  I don't think Id like being a farmer.

We went to this market and he was telling all the people he saw about how much fun the library is and all about the cool stuff you can do there.  This didn't seem right.  He was bored yet he was telling all the other people how fun the library is?  Was Mr. Guy telling lies to all of the farmers at the market?  

I wasn't going to say anything about this to him, but finally I had to.  I asked him why he was telling people that the library was fun when he was bored there.  He told me that he was not bored; he was on the B-O-A-R-D.   He likes the library a lot.  His kind of board is for people who want to make the library an even more fun place.  He said that all of the farmers could come.  In fact, he told everyone he met at the market that they could come to his library.

I sure am glad that we got that cleared up!  I was afraid that I wouldn't get to go to the library and get new books anymore!  Then I would be bored!

Now I am looking forward to the rest of our summer vacation together!

Late Night Reading

Offspring No. 1 likes books a lot!  She tried to share some of her books with me, but I don't understand them.  They are called science friction and they have great big words that this little blue and orange furry monster does not know.  Since I can't read those books, she showed me in our library where the books for little monsters are.  

She thought I might like some by a doctor who sues people.  I don't know why she thought that.  And anyway, I didn't think doctors sued people.  I thought lawyers sued doctors.  Maybe these books are science friction for little monsters.  There science could be the doctor part and the friction the lawyer part.  I still wasn't sure I would like these stories, but Offspring No. 1 said that she liked them when she was little like me.

When I opened the book, the words were not too hard for me.  I was surprised by that and also that  there were no words about doctors or lawyers.  The book was about an elephant and specks of dust.  Hmmm...I guess that is kind of about science - zoology and dustology.  And there was a little friction between the elephant and a monkey and a kangaroo.  But no one ever got sued.  The book ended with everyone living happily ever after.  I don't think people are happy after they get sued.

My favorite part of the book is when the elephant says, "A person's a person no matter how small."  I think that means monsters too.  

I hope Offspring No. 1 doesn't tell Mr. Guy and The Lady that I was reading when I was supposed to be in bed asleep.  The Offspring said it would probably be okay if they found out.  When she was little she used to stay up late reading books too.  Since Mr. Guy and The Lady like books too so I probably wouldn't get in trouble if they knew I snuck out of bed to read a book.  It would be different if I was playing with Lego or watching HGTV.  Then I would be in trouble.

Happy Mother’s Day

I spent a happy weekend with my family, all of them, the two-legged ones, the four-legged ones, the furry ones and the bald ones.  I love all of my people and monsters!  I'm really happy that The Lady is my mom - even if I do have to share her with lots of others!  I think she has enough love for us all.  I also think that she got lots of practice being a mom with the Offsprings.  By the time I got here, they were all grown up and she was an expert mom.  I don't know if The Offsprings would agree with me on that, though.

Isn't it funny that even though it was Mother's Day, we have a photo with Mr. Guy, me, and the four-legged monsters.  That is because The Lady says that she would much rather be behind the camera than in front of it.

My family and I wish everyone a Happy Mother's Day!  This means all mothers!  Those of offspring, those of furry little blue and orange monsters, those of four-legged furry babies, and all those that have given of themselves to be a mother figure in the life of someone else.

Waiting for What?

The Lady has a flat square box that she stands on sometimes.  Some days she smiles when she looks at it and some days she doesn't.  The Lady told me that this flat square box tells her how much her wait is.  I'm not quite sure what she is waiting for.  Maybe Christmas.  Maybe breakfast.  Maybe for the Amazon guy to deliver something.  Maybe for a trip.  She could be waiting for lots of things.  

What I wonder is how the box knows for which of those things it is supposed to tell her her wait.  

She doesn't talk to the square box like Mr. Guy does his cylinder box in the kitchen.  The cylinder box even has a name, Alexa.  Mr. Guy really likes talking to his cylinder box.  And it likes talking to him too.  It tells him all kinds of stuff like jokes and what is going on in the news.  Mr. Guy says that sometimes it is hard to tell the difference between jokes and the news.  He can ask his friend Alexa, the cylinder box, how long he has to wait for Christmas.  Or how long his food has to cook.  And it knows.  The Lady's square box is not not as friendly or as smart as Mr. Guy's cylinder box.

This furry little blue and orange monster would rather talk to friends than either a flat box or cylinder box.  I prefer to just ask Mr. Guy or The Lady how long I have to wait for stuff.

Dots, Lines, Words, and Funny Clothes

So yesterday, The Lady and I were sitting in our library thinking about all of the books that we could read together once she finished her semester.  The Lady said she doesn't have enough time to read very many books during the school year.  To me, that seemed like a funny thing to say because I thought school was all about reading lots of books and learning new stuff.  I asked her about this and she said that school books are different from reading books.  Maybe that is because most of her school books are filled with lines and dots and curly things instead of letters and words.  I like books where the words all go together and tell a story.  Her line and dot and curly things books don't tell a story, at least they don't tell a story that this little furry blue and orange monster can read.

And as of today,  school is officially over for The Lady!   Tonight was graduation at her school.  That where her students go when they are all done with reading school books.  The clothes that she has to wear when she goes to graduation are funny looking, especially the hat.  Why does anyone want to wear a square on their head?  I definitely don't want to.   That square hat doesn't fit over my horns at all.  And that pink and green thing around her neck...I like that even less than the funny square hat.  Orange and blue are so much prettier than pink and green!  The Lady told me that she has to wear those colors...something about all of the school books with dots and lines that she read and the school she went to when she was reading them.  That's too bad for her.  She should have picked different books or a different school or maybe both!

The good part of all of this is that it is now summer vacation time at our house!  We'll see what kind of books we find to read now.  Maybe there are some about furry little monsters like me.  Hopefully whatever books I read won't make me have to wear funny looking clothes when I am done!

Flowers and Fixes

The Lady is in her final week.  No wait...that sounds bad...in her FINALS week, her last week of school and she is very busy and sleepy and kind of grouchy...but don't tell her I said that.  Last night she didn't have time to help me write because she had to scribble in purple ink all over a bunch of papers.  They were not very pretty when she was done.  I think the papers might have looked better if she had used blue and orange ink to color on them.

Last night before we had dinner, we did go outside to look at the garden.  There was a tree with some new flowers on it.  The flowers were great big and had Christmas lights in them.  Don't they look light Christmas lights in the middle?

The Lady said that it is not a Christmas light; those are parts of the flower called stick-mans and stay-mans.  Those names don't make any senseto me, but I think that's what she said.  They sure look more like Christmas lights than they do any kind of man - stick or staying.  Maybe they are stick-mans and stay-mans because these flowers are called Man-gos.  But wait if it's Man-gos, why do they have stay-mans?  And does the stick-man stay or go?  I'm so confused.

Hold on a minute while I go ask The Lady to explain all of this to me...

I now know more about these Christmas light flowers than I ever wanted to.  They are called MAGNOLIAS, not man-gos.  And the Christmas light part is stigmas and stamen.  I'm still confused, but at least now I don't have to worry about stick men coming and going.  

*****

I like to go get the recycling stuff and presents out of brick box in our front yard.  I still don't know why the guy in the little white truck always brings back and stuffs the brick box with all the recycling stuff that Mr. Guy had put out in the blue bin for the big white truck to take away.  I think these guys are all confused about what is staying and what is going!  The recycling is supposed to go away.  The guy in the little white truck brings more recycling than he does good stuff, but you never know when the good stuff will come so we have to look every day to see what he left after Mr. Guy puts the recycling back in the blue bin.

Today there was a big package in the brick box.  I was excited because I thought it might be something for me. I haven't gotten a package in a long time.  

I looked at the name on the package and it did not say Blueper B.  It said Kris B.  (That's The Lady's other name.)  I was sad that the present wasn't for me.  I need some new t-shirts.  The Lady said that it was new clothes for her from a place called Stitch Fix.

Stitch Fix?  

If the clothes are new, why do they already need to be fixed?  Maybe this is one of those things like when The Lady gets boxes full of lots of balls of string and tells me its a sweater.  The balls of string are not a sweater!  She has to use her sticks to make them become a sweater.  I guess this Stitch Fix thing is pieces in a kit to make-your-own clothes.  If The Lady doesn't have time to help me write my blog post, I don't know how she is going to have time to fix all the stitches so that she has clothes!  And if she tries to use her sweater sticks to fix her kit clothes, I think her clothes might end up with big holes in them.  And if her clothes end up with big holes in them, she'll be REALLY grouchy!

But what do I know?  I'm just a (naked) little blue and orange furry monster!  Maybe after The Lady's final week, we can go shopping...FOR ME!

A New Kind of Strings

We had a quiet day today.  I watched and listened to The Lady play with a different kind of strings than she usually does.  She sometimes plays with sticks and string, but they don't make any noise and when she is done playing with them she has a hat, or a blanket, or mittens.  Today's strings were different.  They aren't soft.  They are attached to a weirdly shaped piece of wood with a long handle.  And, they make noise.  When The Lady is done playing with them,  they go into what I discovered is a really comfortable fur-lined box that has the same weird shape as her hunk of wood with the long handle that holds her strings.  

I took a nap in her comfy box while she made noise.  It was a great day for this little blue and orange furry monster!

#guncontrolnow

Today, unlike yesterday, was a pretty day in Dallas.  Mr. Guy and The Lady had some errands to run. I decided that I would go since I did not spend yesterday with them.  While we were out driving, we spotted a building with lots of orange things in the grass in front of it.  Since I like orange a lot, I asked Mr. Guy if we could stop and look.  

When we got closer, I could see that the orange things were Crosses, Crescents, and Stars of David.

They were in front of a church.

Mr. Guy and The Lady explained to me that there is a convention in our city this weekend of lots of people who believe that guns are an important part of their life.  They think that it is OK for all kinds of people to have all kinds of guns even though everyone knows that people with guns kill lots of other people every single day.  There are 96 symbols in front of this church.  The number 96 represents the number of people who are killed by gun violence every single day in my country.

That is a lot of people!  I don't even have 96 friends I don't think.  So this means that in one day, all of my friends plus some more people I don't even know could all be killed.  That is a crazy thing to have to think about!  I borrowed The Lady's phone to calculate how many people that means are killed by guns in the United States every year - 35,040!!!  That is more people than live in my city!!!  My whole city could be killed by guns in less than one year!  

I thought yesterday was a sad day because of the funeral that The Lady and Mr. Guy had to go to.  Thinking about gun violence makes me sad too!

Why do people think that guns are a good thing?  I understand that policemen and a few other people need them to help them do their jobs, but I don't need or want a gun.  Mr. Guy and The Lady don't need or want them either.  It scares me to think about how many people have guns who don't need them and won't use them properly, whatever that means!

It makes me very sad to think about all of the people that these Crosses, Stars of David, and Crescents represent.

For now, I just keep hoping that things in the world will change by the time I grow up to be a big blue and orange furry monster...that's assuming I even get to grow up and am not shot by someone with a gun.

Sad and Happy

This morning was dark and rainy.  Mr. Guy and The Lady had to get up early and drive several hours to attend a funeral.  I didn't go.  Nothing about the day sounded good to me.  I remember when we went to the funeral for The Captain.  I remember it being both a sad time and a happy time.  Sad becasue the Captain wasn't here with us anymore; but happy because he was not sick and weak anymore either.  I'm still trying to figure out how I can be sad and happy at the same time.

The funeral that The Lady and Mr. Guy went to today was for Ms. Melba.  She has known Mr. Guy since he was a tiny little boy, maybe even tinier than me.  She looked after him for lots of years after his parents went to heaven.  We talked about heaven tonight when Mr. Guy and The Lady got home.  It is not like Lewes, or San Diego, or New York, or Mini-apples, the places I have been.  It is a place that lots of people talk about what it is like there, but no one that I have ever talked to about it has ever been there.  I don't quite understand that.

And I'm just curious...why does the word funeral begin with FUN?  I'm not sure that there is anything fun about them.

Fit a T to Me!

One of my favorite things to do is to collect t-shirts.  I have one from every place that I have visited.  I have several that have been gifts from friends that know I love t-shirts.  T-shirts make a perfect souvenir and also the best gift, at least for this furry little blue and orange monster.  And they are also the perfect clothing.  

T-shirts make good play clothes and work clothes and work out clothes, not that I work out much.  Well, I don't work much either.  But, if I did I would most certainly wear t-shirts for both.  T-shirts also make good pajamas.  They are soft and comfortable, just what this monster needs to stay sound asleep when The Lady is banging around getting ready for work in the middle of the night!  I think t-shirts make good fancy clothes too.  Mr. Guy and The Lady don't agree with me on that.  Sometimes they try to make me wear what they call fancy clothes.  I just call them uncomfortable!

I have a lot of t-shirts because I have visited lots of different places and lots of friends have given me shirts.  Most of the time this a good thing.  The only time it is bad is on laundry day when I have to put all of my shirts on triangles and decorate my closet with them.  Yesterday Mr. Guy washed my shirts.  He left them in my room in a basket.  I like when they are in the basket.  I can reach them easily and it is easier to see the pictures on them than it is when they are like curtains in my closet.  For some reason though, Mr. Guy wanted me to put all of my clean shirts on the triangles and hang them in my closet.  This is not a fun thing to do!

And then, after I spend all this time decorating my closet with all of my cool t-shirts, Mr. Guy and The Lady say that I need to close my closet door.  I just don't get it. Why do I have to put my shirts on triangles and then hide them behind closed closet doors?  Even curtains get to stay out in the open where everyone can see them!.  I like looking at all of my shirts.  Seeing them all makes me happy because they all bring back memories.  They are a pretty sea of blue in my basket.  I can pretend like  I am at the pool or the beach or something fun like that.  But nope.  Today I get to look at an empty basket that reminds me more of a desert instead.  

The good news is that I get to put my dirty shirts back in the desert basket.  So starting tonight, I can work on filling my basket pool again.  Something to look forward to!  

And then next week's shirt washing day will come. :-(

In the Dark

I sure will be glad when The Lady is all done with her school year.  She always comes into my room to say good-bye in the morning before she goes to work.  I think she leaves for work in the middle of the night.  It is super dark when she kisses me good-bye.  This furry little blue and orange monster is not awake when it is super dark outside.  I'm not even awake when it is still a little dark outside.  My eyes are squeezed closed and I am sound to sleep until the sun is nice and bright.  I don't know who The Lady teaches when she goes to school in the middle of the night.  I guess there are people who have to go to school then.  I'm sure glad that I am notone of them.  I get to stay at home and learn from Mr. Guy!

When I woke up this morning, I sort of remembered The Lady talking to me before she left.  I thought she said that when she got home that she needed to take a picture of me in my Him Den for her picture taking group.

Him Den?  

Did she mean my room?  I've never heard her call my room a Him Den before.  

I hoped that wasn't what she meant because my room is not very neat right now.  Mr. Guy did all of the laundry yesterday and I have not put mine away yet.  And, I'd have to pick up my books and crayons and make my bed because I know The Lady wouldn't want my Him Den to be messy in her picture.

Him Den???

When I was finally awake enough to join Mr. Guy for breakfast, I asked him what a Him Den was.  He was as confused as I was.  He had no idea what a Him Den was.  He said that some people talk about a Man Cave and told me that a Man Cave is where guys can go to get away from girls.  Hmmm.  I thought a Him Den maybe sounded sort of like a Man Cave.  I asked Mr. Guy if we have a Man Cave.  He laughed and said, "Are you kidding?  We live with The Lady, Girl Offspring No. 1, two girl dogs, and a girl cat.  No!  We do not have a Man Cave; in fact, our whole house is a She Shed!"

A She Shed?

He explained to me that a She Shed is space for girls to do what girls do and a place to keep all of their girl stuff like yarn and magazines and fabric and craft stuff.  

So, I learned something today, but I still was not sure what The Lady meant by a photo of me in my Him Den.  I had to wait until she got home to figure that out.

When The Lady finally got home, I barely said "hi" before I asked her about this Him Den photo thing.  She laughed at me and said that I must have been really asleep when we talked this morning.  She didn't say Him Den.  She said Den Him.  I thought for a minute.

Him Den.  Man Cave.

Den Him.  Cave Man.

The Lady thinks I look like a Cave Man???

I am furry, sort of like a cave man, but I am not a cave man!  I am a sweet little blue and orange furry monster!  Now my feelings were kind of hurt.  The Lady asked me what was wrong and I told her that she hurt my feelings by calling me a cave man.  She laughed at me.  "I don't think you are a Cave Man...or a Den Him.  I am talking about what I need for you to wear, a fabric called D-E-N-I-M, denim.  It's the fabric that jeans are made from."

Ohhhh!  Now this all makes more sense!

Mr. Guy, The Lady, and I all have blue jean DENIM jackets.  All she wanted was for us to take a family picture with all of us wearing them.  What a relief!  

I didn't have to fold my clothes or pick up my crayons.  This all did start me thinking...Maybe I should work on turning my room into a Him Den so that Mr. Guy and I have a boy place where we can go to figure out all the girls that we live with!

I Am Out of Hibernation!

I can't believe that it has been so long since I have written.  I have been acting more like a bear that like a little blue and orange furry monster.  I haven't felt much like being out and about lately.  All of the sudden, the world has seemed like a big and scary place.  I feel most safe when I am at home with Mr. Guy and The Lady, but sometimes they turn on the Tell-Me, or whatever that electric box thing with pictures is called, and it is full of all kinds of people telling me about kids being shot at school and policemen being killed, and food making people sick because it has vanilla salmon in it and the people running our country aren't very nice or well-behaved.  It just doesn't seem like a place I want to spend too much time.  I have been happy at home coloring and listening to music.  I like those things, but Mr. Guy and The Lady think it is time for me to stop hibernating like a bear and live like the happy little monster that I really am.  They said that they would protect me when we are away from home.  I believe them; they have always taken good care of me so I am going to enjoy going places again.

Mr. Guy and The Lady went to Atlanta last weekend.  I did not want to go.  When they got back, though, they told me that they had dinner with Ms. Debbie who has been a friend of The Lady's for a long time, but they had not seen each other for lots of years.  The Lady told me that Ms. Debbie asked all about me.  When I heard that, I was sad that I had not gone.  I wish I had met The Lady's friend.  The Lady told me not to worry,  I will have another chance to meet Ms. Debbie.  That made me smile!

I did make two trips in the last couple months with The Lady.  Mr. Guy did not go with us.  I think he likes hibernating like a bear too.  Maybe it's a boy thing.  I went to a place called Mini-apples and Will-he-walk-here.  At least I think that's where I went.  Those seem like funny names for places to go, especially since I didn't see any apples and I don't know who the "he" is that was supposed to be walking.  I sure hope it wasn't supposed to be me.  I don't walk; I'm always carried.  I do know that in both places I saw my friend Ms. Joni and it snowed.  The Lady said that those two things together were a coincidence.  Ms. Joni does not make it snow!

On both of these adventures, Ms. Joni carried me since Mr. Guy wasn't there.  She seems happy to be with me and that makes me happy!  Ms. Joni even used a picture of the two of us in Mini-apples on her Christmas card!

Ms. Joni also monster-sat me while The Lady was at a meeting.  (That's why we in Mini-apples.)  She is a fun monster-sitter.  Ms. Joni made me cookies and she let me have all that I wanted and I got to eat them in bed!

Oh, and Ms. Joni made me my orange sweater than I have on in our picture.  She really is a nice friend!

Ms. Joni lives in Will-he walk-here.  The Lady and I visited her at her house.  She showed us all the neat things to see and do in her city.  We rode the bus to see some great big domes that were filled with plants and flowers.  It was a very pretty place.  They even had orange and blue flowers!

I had fun looking at all of the pretty flowers, but it was a very cold trip.  I wanted to wear a t-shirt instead of my sweater when we left Texas.  That was not a good decision.  My sweater would have felt much better!  I was a cold little monster, especially when I went outside to play in the snow.  The Lady told me how to lay down in the snow and make an angel.  I don't know if I made an angel, but I'm pretty sure I made a frozen monster!

Now I am back in Texas.

It is warm here in Texas now.  Today, Mr. Guy and The Lady took me to the park to play at the playground.  It felt good to be outside and to get some fresh air.  

All the people at the park were nice. Maybe if I don't listen to the people on the Tell-Me box thing, I will be a happy monster and enjoy going places and meeting new people again.

It was so happy that Mr. Guy was with me and that The Lady took some new pictures of us.  We haven't had our picture taken together in a long time!

Every May, The Lady helps me write a blog post every single day.  That is hard work for both of us, but we always have fun when we do it.  

Thank you for reading my blog.  I hope you will come back.  I am looking forward to lots more adventures this month.

Thank you for being my friend!